


that wasn't very cash money of you

by barnes (sceaps)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bisexual Bruce Banner, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Gay Bucky Barnes, Gay Steve Rogers, High School, I Promise There's Plot, In Love, M/M, Memes, Mutual Pining, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, RIP, Recreational Drug Use, Requited Unrequited Love, Steve Rogers likes cats, Steve and Bucky are idiots, Texting, bucky owns a cat, chatfic, groupchat, he had a harry potter phase, named sherbet lemon, so many memes, steve rogers is clueless af, text fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-19
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2020-09-07 11:08:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20308486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sceaps/pseuds/barnes
Summary: mrstank: to make a long fucking story shortmrstank: i put a whole bag of jellybeans up my assjimbo: in what worldSteve Rogers: Tony, what the hell?Steve Rogers: I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not and it’s scaring me.jimbo: ignore him stevejimbo: hes jealous of nat and clint and taking it out on the poor jellybeansmrstank: okay, rude. next youre gonna be telling me you dont wanna eat any of themSteve Rogers: TONY!jimbo: i mean...you did say they were in a bag rightSteve Rogers: Bucky Nojimbo: bucky yesjust a lil feel-good high school au as told through a groupchat :D





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhodey: *x files theme plays*
> 
> mrstank: but thats just a theory a gay theory
> 
> Falcon: aaaaand cut

_ Clint Barton has added Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanov, and 8 others _

_ Clint Barton has changed their name to _clönt börtön

clönt börton: yo

clönt börton: my girlfriend is literally insane

Natasha Romanov: shut uP clint

Natasha Romanov: ignore him he’s high af rn

clönt börton: ok so

clönt börton: nat and i were making out

clönt börton: i pull off her shirt

clönt börton: she’s got two guns on her belt

clönt börton: i take em off, she climbs on top of me

clönt börton: somethings digging into my thidhf 

clönt börton: thifh 

clönt börton: THIGH

clönt börton: it’s another fucking gun

clönt börton: anyone wanna guess how many she had on her

Natasha Romanov: shut up clint 

clönt börton: five

clönt börton: ALL LOADED

clönt börton: seriously i cant make this shit up

_ Sam Wilson has changed their name to _Falcon

Falcon_ has changed _ clönt börton’s _ name to _mohawk man

mohawk man: fucking lurker

mohawk man: also: low blow, dude

Natasha Romanov: lighten up asshole they were nerf guns

Steve Rogers: Natasha. 

Steve Rogers: Why do you have five Nerf guns on your person? Not to mention they were in your belt, but...why? In what world—

_ Thor Odinson has changed their name to _GOF IF THINDWR

_ Thor Odinson has changed their name to GOD IFCTHURNDER _

_ Thor Odinson has changed their name to GOF ODT THURBER _

GOF ODT THURBER: Hey Siri send message somebody change my username to God of thunder 

Falcon _ has changed _ GOF ODT THURBER’s _ name to _panini

Falcon: He has lokis old phone cuz he broke his phone yesterday 

Falcon: P sure hes usin a 4s rn lmao

Falcon: Sucks to suck amirite

panini: Hey Siri send message go back to your hovel Mr. Wilson I am going to rip off your arms and shove them up your butt send message send

_ James Rhodes has changed their name to _Rhodey

Rhodey: rip

Rhodey _ has changed Anthony Stark’s name to _TONYYY

Steve Rogers _ has changed James Barnes’s name to _Bucky

panini: Hey Siri send message can I add Jane send

Bruce Banner: of course!! gimme a sex

Bruce Banner: sex

Bruce Banner: sec

Natasha Romanov: since when are yall banging??

Natasha Romanov: and how come no one invited me to join >:(

Natasha Romanov: traitors

TONYYY_ has changed _ Natasha Romanov’s _ name to _i have a nerf gun up my ass

mohawk man: is my company not good enough for u nat

_Bruce Banner_ _has added Jane Foster to the chat_

Jane Foster: GO BACK TO SCANDINAVIA THOR

Jane Foster: But take me with you plz

Jane Foster: love you 

panini: HEY SIRI SEND MESSAGE I LOVE JANE MORE THAN I LOVE BRUCE ALSO WE ARE NOT HAVING SEX SORRY NATALIA

i have a nerf gun up my ass: natasha**

i have a nerf gun up my ass: TONY I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD

i have a nerf gun up my ass: YOU FUCKIN BITCH I WILL MURDER YOU DEAD I STG

mohawk man: i’ll help babe

TONYYY: with what? a nerf gun?

mohawk man: _ five _nerf guns**

i have a nerf gun up my ass: FUCK YOU TONY

mohawk man: we didn’t even have sex

mohawk man _ changed _ i have a nerf gun up my ass’s _ name to _nat

Bucky _ changed _ nat’s _ name to _Natalia Alianova Romanova

Natalia Alianova Romanova: this is america james

Natalia Alianova Romanova: get with the program

Bucky: call me james one more time and i’ll rip your head off with my teeth

Natalia Alianova Romanova: kinky

Jane Foster: ok this is too weird even for me

_ Jane Foster has left the chat _

Natalia Alianova Romanova _ changed their name to _nat

nat: james

nat: james

nat: jim

nat: jimmy

nat: jimbo

Bucky: sTAHPP

nat: jimothy

Bucky: yeah that’s it i’m out

nat _ changed _ Bucky’s _ name to _jimbo

Steve Rogers: Play nice, Nat. 

nat: his teenage angst is no problem of mine

Steve Rogers: He’s really stressed about college applications right now

nat: o

mohawk man: o

Steve Rogers: Just...take it easy on each other, okay?

TONYYY: ok dad

nat: coolege 

mohawk man: sorry no can do bud me n nat r kinda banging so like

mohawk man: not a thing

Steve Rogers: I did not need to know that. I could have been perfectly fine living my life without ever reading that

nat: sometimes i forget he isn’t a virgin

Steve Rogers: Nat

nat: the way he talks

Steve Rogers: Nat No

nat: u text liek a fuxkin grandpa lolol

nat: grandpa steve

Falcon: shutup im team steve 

Falcon: hes a great guy and if i wasnt so straight id totally date him to death

TONYYY: wait

TONYYY: can we backtrack 

TONYYY: are u telling me that our very own steven grant has already popped his cherry at the tender age of seventeen

nat: yup

TONYYY:

nat: w me lol

TONYYY: how did i not know about this

TONYYY: nat i wanna say u could do much better but honestly u couldn’t steve is like,,,honor and bravery and honestly kinda hot even if he’s tiny

jimbo _ has removed _ TONYYY _ from the groupchat. _

nat: cold

mohawk man: ayy we got our first removal

Rhodey _ added Anthony Stark to the groupchat. _

Rhodey_ changed Anthony Stark’s name to _mrstank

Rhodey: Damn bucky

jimbo: yall assholes wanna stop talking about steve for one goddamn second

jimbo: he dowsnt like it

mohawk man: f

Falcon: f

nat: sorry stevie we love you

mohawk man: proof

nat: shut ur face clint 

mohawk man: coward, get over here and do it yourself 

jimbo: he’s sitting right next to me and he’s scrolling thru twitter

jimbo: hes swiping ur notifs away

jimbo: waitin for him to put the gc on dnd

jimbo: aaaaand there he goes

mrstank: just out of curiosity, what’s he looking at on twitter?

panini: Hey Siri send message does anyone want to play fortnite

Falcon: no

jimbo: hes retweeting smth abt harry potter 

Falcon: thats our boi!!

jimbo: idk what it was about but i caught the words “fandom” and “Voldy” and “Drarry”

mrstank:

mrstank: hOLY FUCKIN SHIT MY DUDES

mrstank: YALL THOUGH STEVE WAS INNOCENT?? N OPE

mrstank: I COULD LITERALLY HACK HIS BROWSING HISTORY RN

mrstank: ID BETCHA LIKe a HUNDERED BUXKS HES READING DRARRY PORN

Rhodey: Probably he’s just trying to fill the void inside his soul

Falcon: more likely, hes pining over bucky too hard and is depressed that he’s isn’t riding his dick rn

Rhodey: *x files theme plays*

mrstank: but thats just a theory a gay theory

Falcon: aaaaand cut

— 

mrstank: clint and natasha have been gone an awfully long time

mrstank: u don’t think

Rhodey: U don’t think. U know

—

_ Bucky Barnes >> Steve Rogers _

Bucky: hey

Bucky: uh

Bucky: everything ok?

Bucky: u seemed kinda tense on the gc

Steve: Yeah. 

Steve: I’ve just been really stressed lately. 

Steve: There’s all that stuff going on with Mom, and I really need to pay more attention in class

Bucky: u know it isn’t criminal to need a break every once in a while

Bucky: if u ever wanna ditch class i can come with and beg for tonys notes later 

Bucky: or if u didn’t want me there i could take notescfor u 

Steve: I can’t ditch. I have perfect attendance and it’s the one thing I can’t ruin. 

Steve: But of course I’d want you with me if I did decide to ditch. End of the line, remember?

Bucky: i mean it

Steve: I mean it too. 

Bucky: ok get ur ass over here i need to give you a fucking hug

Steve: Five seconds

_ Steve Rogers >> Nat Romanov _

Steve: Nat. 

Steve: I am royally screwed. 

Nat: pls say “fucked” we aren’t preschoolers

Steve: I am royally fucked. Happy? Can we proceed?

Nat: jesus ok whycthe sudden sass

Steve: I’m over at Bucky’s right now. He offered a hug. I accepted. He smells like Axe Body Spray. Nat, in what world? There are plenty of eligible men and women in the world. Why did I have to fall for _ him? _

Nat: f

Nat: thTs ruff bud

Steve: He also smells like Doritos. 

Steve: Cool ranch 

Nat: gross 

Steve: We were eating them earlier

Steve: I really like him 

Steve: Oh no

Steve: Why did it have to be Axe?

Nat: lmao rip 

Nat: can i get a bruh sound effect #2 up in this bitch

_ Steve Rogers >> Nat Romanov _

Steve: The thing is...this is a fairly new development.

Nat: w

Steve: He used to smell like cinnamon. I miss it. 

Nat: everyone makes questionable decisions in their youth

Nat: ur mans just decided to go for axe instead of old spice 

Nat: i can have a talk with him if u want

Nat: russian to russian 

Steve: NO

Steve: He Cannot Know

Nat: how long have u secretly been in love with him for again?? i Forgot

Steve: Pretty much since grade school, TBH

Nat: u poor boi but also one day we gotta teach u proper netspeak that capitalization nearly sent me into cardiac arrest 

Steve: This is what I get for trying something new. 

Steve: But we’re straying from the point. 

Steve: What do I do?

Steve: Can I even do anything?

Steve: What is love?

Nat: bABY DONT HURT ME

Nat: DONT HURT ME

Nat: NO MORE

Steve: I do not understand why I dated you. 

Nat: cuz ur cute as hell and u wanted to draw me lololol

Nat: but in all seriousness send those sketches to risd they’ll be begging u to go to school there

Nat: full ride

Nat: ur gonna graduate with no student debt and a poppin degree in somethin artsy

Nat: all thanks to ur ex gf

Nat: (and her beautiful hair)

Nat: dont forget me when ur famous

Steve: You were sounding good until you started waxing poetic about yourself. Friendship terminated

Nat: that wasn’t very cash money of you

Steve: Cash money?

Nat: nvm 

Nat: go cuddle ur husband while i suck my boyfriends dick

Steve: NATASHA.

Nat: ;)

  
Falcon _ has named the group chat _ that wasn’t very cash money of you

mrstank: nice

Nat: nice

Rhodey: nice

Steve Rogers: I don’t understand what’s going on, but: 

Steve Rogers: Nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welcome to this shitshow


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HULK SMASH: well, riding the hypothetical coming out train, i’m bi if that counts  
nat: ofc!! bi is valid  
HULK SMASH: aww ty uwu  
nat: nvm ur dead to me

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

mrstank: to make a long fucking story short

mrstank: i put a whole bag of jellybeans up my ass

jimbo: in what world

Steve Rogers: Tony, what the hell?

Steve Rogers: I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not and it’s scaring me.

jimbo: ignore him steve

jimbo: hes jealous of nat and clint and taking it out on the poor jellybeans

mrstank: okay, rude. next youre gonna be telling me you dont wanna eat any of them

Steve Rogers: TONY!

jimbo: i mean...you did say they were in a bag right

Steve Rogers: Bucky No

jimbo: bucky yes

Pepper Potts: Tony, what the hell?

Steve Rogers: That’s what I said!

Pepper Potts: Tony I swear on all things holy you better be joking about this

Falcon: Since when are we allowed to quote vines 

mrstank: only i am

Falcon: damn :(

mrstank  _ changed Pepper Potts’s name to  _ pep loml

pep loml: I don’t know what that means.

jimbo: dont look it up

pep loml: Please don’t tell me it’s something dirty

Falcon: No, just...don’t do it

Steve Rogers: What does loml mean?

pep loml: That’s what I said!

pep loml  _ changed their name to  _ Pep

Pep: Better.

mrstank: ur missing a great opportunity ms potts

Pep: You’re missing a great number of brain cells. Mr. Stark.

Bruce Banner: BOOM ROASTED

Scott Lang: [ohhhh.gif]

_ Bruce Banner has changed their name to  _ HULK SMASH

_ Scott Lang has changed their name to antman _

antman: damn yall just got got

antman: is that...fire i smell

Steve Rogers: There’s a fire?

jimbo: no

Steve Rogers: Oh

antman: sure there is

antman: i can smell it all the way over here

Pep: What?

antman: the wreckage from that sICK BURN

HULK SMASH: ayyy

antman: ayyy

mrstank: i hate each and every one of you

mrstank: except rhodey bc he is the true loml

Pep: WHAT’S LOML??

Steve Rogers: WHAT IS LOML

Pep: 

Steve Rogers: Pepper

Steve Rogers: What is going on?

Pep: I? Have absolutely no idea? You better stop

mrstank: damn yall are way in sync

mrstank: if you two dated id cry simultaneously at how perfect it would be and because

mrstank: yeah

Pep: Because…?

mrstank: beacus

Steve Rogers: I don’t really date women. Sorry, Pepper.

jimbo: me too lol

jimbo: 

jimbo: wait what

mrstank: buck u make gay jokes every two seconds this isnt new. dont ruin my boi steves coming out experience

HULK SMASH: that was coming out?

mrstank: congrats bud

mrstank: or whatever ig

jimbo: i,,,what

HULK SMASH: maybe hes just too busy to date anyone...like hes into women but doesnt have the time rn? didn’t he date nat??

jimbo: what in the sam hill

_ Steve Rogers has changed their name to  _ STEVE ROGERS

STEVE ROGERS: What

jimbo: whatd u just say

STEVE ROGERS: What do you mean?

jimbo: did u just

jimbo: fr

jimbo: wait

jimbo: r u

jimbo: u know

jimbo: ...

STEVE ROGERS: I’m going to go get a snack. BRB

mohawk man: i see weve missed a lot

mohawk man: n i ce

HULK SMASH: no idea what happened, did steve just come out as gay or something? 

mrstank: not sure what he meant by that tbh,.

HULK SMASH: well, riding the hypothetical coming out train, i’m bi if that counts

nat: ofc!! bi is valid

HULK SMASH: aww ty uwu

nat: nvm ur dead to me

_ Bucky Barnes>> Nat Romanov _

Bucky: okay what the hell just happened??

Bucky: does steve rogers is gay? fuckin yEs? im gonna bust

Nat: a nut?

Bucky: yes

Bucky: no

Bucky: later

Nat: gross

Bucky: nothin i havent done already b

Nat: fair enough

Nat: sO

Nat: u gonna get ur shit together n ask him out or what??

Bucky: idk

Bucky: No

Bucky: weve been friends since we were literal newborns i cant fuck that up

Bucky: but damn do i wanna

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

antman: i want tacos

HULK SMASH: i got some

antman: come over

_ Steve Rogers >> Nat Romanov _

Steve: Nat.

Steve: NAT!

Steve: I just came out!

Steve: I think.

Steve: I’ve been wanting to do it for a while, and it just...happened, I guess.

Steve: I feel so weird.

Steve: I should text Buck.

Steve: He was acting strange after I said... _ that... _ on the groupchat

Steve: Gosh, that’s so weird. I don’t want to type it out.

Steve: I mean...you’ve known for a while.

Steve: There was a reason we broke up.

Steve: I can’t type it out. I can’t. 

Steve: This is so weird.

Steve: They know now.

Steve: I think I might actually cry.

Steve: My hands are shaking, I’m typing half of these words wrong. Autocorrect is my savior

Nat: autocorrect is truly a g

Steve: You’re here!

Steve: Okay.

Nat: you gonna do anything about bucky??

Steve: I…

Steve: I don’t know.

Steve: I’ve felt this way towards him for so long.

Steve: I have since I was in grade school.

Steve: But he’s been out for years, you know? And I don’t know if I’m ready for that yet.

Nat: if ur uncomfy w it then its prob not a good idea

Nat: but if u really want this and ur willing to come out or whatever

Nat: i think u should go for it man

Nat: but its up to u

Steve: …

Steve: I’ll think about it.

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

Rhodey: Guys

Rhodey: Tony and i are playing the sims rn

Rhodey: And we’re making all of you

Rhodey: [natnatnat.jpg]

Rhodey: nat was easy i just had to make her emo

nat: i resent that

jimbo: lmao its ok nat everyone’s had an emo phase ur just goin thru it

jimbo: ur a sophomore so its ok

jimbo: but u better stop before u become a junior or ur gonna get bullied h a r d

Rhodey: [americasass.jpg]

Rhodey: Captain rogers was also easy, i just had to make him thicc

Rhodey  _ has changed  _ STEVE ROGERS _ ’s name to cap _

mrstank: i remember when i was a junior lmao

mrstank: yall were sophomores and steve was still tiny

mrstank: still shook by that growth spurt tbh

mrstank: he has actual muscles now

mrstank: hes on the football team

mrstank: stevie if u leave us for the jocks i will never forgive u

HULK SMASH: cant believe we’re seniors already

mrstank: damn ikr

mrstank: yall gonna be ok without us n pep next year??

jimbo: i think we’re gonna be just fine

HULK SMASH: well still visit ofc

mrstank: yee

mrstank: bruce if we both get accepted to mit you arent allowed to go to yale ok??

mrstank: i will be CRUSHED

mrstank: (ok like ik ur education comes before friends n u can go wherever u want ill still love you bb)

mohawk man: aww science bros

nat: i ship it

Rhodey: Damn what happened to shipping tony and me?? Thought we had chemistry but ig not

Rhodey: [depresso_espresso.jpg]

mrstank: aww rhodey

mrstank: u know u always come first in my heart

mohawk man: thats what she said

mohawk man: wait no

nat: u tried

HULK SMASH: f

Rhodey: f

mrstank: f

cap: What’s the F for?

Pep: What’s th

Pep: Beat me to it

cap: :)

jimbo: holy shit

_ Bucky Barnes >> Nat Romanov _

Bucky: NAT

Bucky: u saw that right

Bucky: Steven Grant Rogers, the love of my life, just said “:)”

Nat: and this is significant...why?

Bucky:

Bucky: NATALIA

Bucky: aight ik u met clint through a blind hookup or wtv it was but ive been in love w steve since forever

Bucky: and i dont think u understand just exactly how cute it is that hes somehow finally using semi human textspeak

Nat: ur right

Nat: i dont understand this at all

Bucky: trust me on this, nat. revolutionary.  _ revolutionary.  _

Nat: thats kinda gay man, u wearin socks

Bucky:

Bucky: no

Bucky: goddammit

Bucky: [unoreverse.jpg]

Nat: [reverse_reverse_plus_4.jpg]

Bucky: damn

Nat: u have just been bested by ur superior. i am ur mother now. you may not call me anything else n certainly not natalia

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

jimbo: mom

jimbo: can we get taco bell

Nat: sure thing son

antman: BRUCE AND I HAD TACOS EARLIER

antman: wait

antman: mom?

antman: son?

antman: wtf

mrstank: curiouser and curiouser

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy sunday! another chapter down :D
> 
> i have a bunch of prewritten chapters, shit's pretty wild. subscribe for notifs when next week's chapter is up!
> 
> thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> #2 sherbet stan: *chef kiss*  
#2 sherbet stan: very nice

cap: I feel the need to make a public service announcement

mohawk man: this should be good

jimbo: no wait

cap: I’m at Buck’s house and I would like to say that Sherbet is the cutest little baby I’ve ever met.

cap: (I know, I know, she’s actually four, but she’ll always be a baby in my heart.)

cap: [sherbet_lemon.mp4]

Falcon: @jimbo your cat is baby

jimbo: thanks ik

Falcon _ has changed their name to _#1 sherbet stan

jimbo: thanks but that title’s gotta go to steve

cap: She just yawned! Her little teeth showed for half a second

cap: [sherbet_yawn.jpg]

cap: Isn’t she just adorable?

cap: I love her so much! I would adopt her if I could, but I would never take her away from Bucky. 

cap: But it’s tempting. She’s so sweet!

#1 sherbet stan: ok you’re right dammit

#1 sherbet stan _ has changed their name to _#2 sherbet stan

cap: Guys, I don’t think you understand. Bucky’s mom just got home and Sherbet’s ears perked up when the door opened! She shot straight up

cap: Sherbet Lemon is too sweet for this world. This has been a PSA by myself, Steven Grant Rogers. 

jimbo: when are the autographs

cap: This was a PSA, not a Ted Talk

jimbo: oh

cap: I’ll still autograph something for you, though. 

cap: If you were being serious.

cap: I don’t care what the hypothetical event was, I’d still do it. For you, anyway.

jimbo: aww thanks 

jimbo: love you :”)

cap: Love you too, Buck

Cap: :)

#2 sherbet stan: jesus, yall need to get a room or smth

nat: fuckin gay lmao

_ Bucky Barnes >> Nat Romanov _

Bucky: NAT

Bucky: he did it again

Bucky: [message_screenshot_1.jpg]

Bucky: the smiley thing

Bucky: n he said ily back hkskdfsf

Bucky: like obviously a friend thing but still

Bucky: u cant see me rn but im smiling so hard its fucking embarrassing

Bucky: ohh my god i really like him

Bucky: hes soc ute what the hell this is illegal

Bucky: HE SAID I LOVE YOU!!! AHHHHH

Bucky: (੭ˊ꒳ˋ)੭♡

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

#2 sherbet stan: [new_pot.jpg]

#2 sherbet stan: Got my favorite aloe plant a new pot! i hope she likes this one better than the last

mohawk man: ha

mohawk man: u got ur plant some pot

#2 sherbet stan: nO

mohawk man: seems a little neglectful to me

mohawk man: bad parenting

#2 sherbet stan: How dare you accuse my plant of participating in recreational marijuana usage

#2 sherbet stan: She’s a good girl

#2 sherbet stan: I raised her better than that

jimbo: @HULK SMASH U GOTTA HELP ME BRO

jimbo: FORGOT ABOUT THE ESSAY FOR SCHMIDT N ITS DUE IN AN HOUR

jimbo: can’t believe this shit, break just ended and he assigns a phat essay in the first week of school

jimbo: @HULK SMASH

jimbo: @HULK SMASH

jimbo: @HULK SMASH

HULK SMASH: it’s gucci man u have till 11:59 u should be fine

jimbo: i barely even know what i’m supposed to be writing about

HULK SMASH: 19th century murica vs england

#2 sherbet stan: Damn forgot y’all were in apush

#2 sherbet stan: Thats gotta be awful

jimbo: i rly shouldn’t be tho

jimbo: steve was taking the class so i did too

jimbo: @mrstank ur smart right?? u good at history cuz i have an essay due in an hour

#2 sherbet stan: How about u write it now instead of texting us

HULK SMASH: why don’t u talk to steve

HULK SMASH: isn’t he taking the same class

jimbo: y e a h

jimbo: ill see

_ Sam Wilson >> Bucky Barnes _

Sam: Bruhhh

Sam: What’s been going on with you and steve lately

Sam: You’ve been acting weird around each other for the past week

Bucky: wdym

Bucky: everything’s fine

Sam: Have it your way, but steve only sat with us three times last week and he sat by me instead of you which...isn’t like him

Sam: Idk what’s going on, but you’d better sort it out. You’ve been way too mopey lately for it to be good for your health

Bucky: everything’s fine ok

Bucky: it’s all fine

Sam: Okay man, whatever you say

Sam: But you know i’m here if you wanna talk right

Bucky: yeah

Bucky: thanks man

Sam: Now go write your essay before you fail out of high school lmao

Sam: Nerd

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

mrstank: ughhh

mrstank: erskine sucks

mrstank: can’t wait to get out of here for college

cap: The school might suck, but don’t go hating on Erskine

cap: He’s founded something like three different schools

cap: It’s an honor and a privilege to go Abraham Erskine Memorial High

mrstank: is it tho

mrstank: is it

cap:

cap: I think so

HULK SMASH: academics r fine but the social bit sucks ass

mrstank: brucie it’s ok if no one wants to be friends with you, i always will

HULK SMASH: aww

mrstank: ily bitch

#2 sherbet stan: *guitar strum*

mrstank: i ain’t gon nnever stop lovign ya

mrstank: bitch

#2 sherbet stan: gotta get that good meme content

#2 sherbet stan: *chef kiss*

#2 sherbet stan: very nice

— 

mrstank: guys

mrstank: i think i found someone

mrstank: can i add him

Rhodey: Kinda gay man

mrstank: no he’s a freshie you absolute doorknob that’s practically pedophilia

mrstank: sounds like his voice dropped literally last week lmao he’s so squeaky

mrstank: but he’s hella smart, he’s my lab partner in ap chem and he’s literally 14

mrstank: i know he’s on the young side but i promise it’s worth it

#2 sherbet stan: Does he have good memes

mrstank: seem pretty spicy to me

#2 sherbet stan: Sweet

#2 sherbet stan: Go right ahead broski

mrstank _ added Peter Parker _

Peter Parker: heyy

Peter Parker: whoa is this the legendary gc mr stark was telling me about??

nat_ has changed Peter Parker’s name to _spiderman

nat: whoa

nat: r u that kid in my dance class

spiderman: think so?? who is this

nat: ur mom lolol

mohawk man: u know nat?? red hair, really hot, rbf, emo, lots of leather, can and will beat you up

spiderman: oh!

spiderman: natasha!

spiderman: yeah i know you

spiderman: im peter btw

spiderman: hey everyone! hey again to mr stark!

nat: i am slightly concerned that you recognized me by that description

nat: am i really that gross

mohawk man: it’s ok babe even though u have rbf ur still hot

nat: nice

HULK SMASH: @spiderman question

spiderman: shoot!

HULK SMASH: well, two actually

HULK SMASH: 1) what is the significance of the name “spiderman”

HULK SMASH: 2) why do u keep calling tony mr stark??

nat: spiderman is cuz we were in class n he basically stuck to the ceiling while we were practicing this one move 

spiderman: there was superglue on my fingers!! ned and i has just had shop and the glue had spilled everywhere

nat: it was either that or ratman lmao 

nat: cuz he’s a rat

nat: tiny n able to squeeze his way through really tight spaces 

nat: but ratman sounds like batman and that’s copyrighted content

mrstank: u couldn’t plead fair use?? come on we could totally call the kid batman

nat: no

spiderman: idk whats going on

spiderman: mr stark?

HULK SMASH: ...mr stark? again? this requires an explanation

spiderman: oh!

spiderman: it’s kind of an inside joke

HULK SMASH: wow

HULK SMASH @mrstank can’t believe you’re out here making inside jokes with someone who isn’t me or pepper 

HULK SMASH: betrayal

HULK SMASH: we’re breaking up

spiderman: wait you were dating? mr stark i thought you were dating pepper 

mrstank: i uh

HULK SMASH: tony…?

mrstank: notcsatin fpeppe 

mrstank: ** not dating pepper

mrstank: sry 4 bad spelling my hands r cold

nat: it’s ninety degrees

_ Tony Stark has added Bruce Banner and Peter Parker _

Tony: pete: you better not make me regret trusting you

Peter: mr stark?? what’s going on

Tony: same to u bruce, trust u but if this gets out ur dead

Bruce: understood. is this about who i think it is

Tony: idk

Tony: it’s ahoutcoeooer 

Tony: it’s about pepper **

Bruce:

Bruce: bruhhh

Bruce: seriously man literally everyone knows you’re all over her

Bruce: we been knew

Peter: why are we talking about pepper potts behind her back??? and are you two breaking up over text and making me watch??

Tony: no

Tony: about pepper

Tony: i uhh

Tony: kindareallylikeher

Tony: a lottttt

Tony: so

Peter: wait

Peter: you aren’t dating bruce

Bruce: i wish 

Bruce: [sad_cowboy.jpg]

Tony: no we are not

Tony: not anymore anyway

Peter: wow tea

Peter: ok so basically you really like pepper and you dated bruce...before??

Peter: why don’t you just ask pepper out lol 

Bruce: ^^

Tony: bEXAUSE

Tony: she’s literally perfect 

Tony: she’d never say yes

Tony: i literally don’t even know why she’s friends with us, she could totally be super popular if she wanted 

Tony: she kinda is tbh, she’s friends with all of Them anyway and everyone’s all over her

Tony: she could date whoever she wanted to, practically all the straight guys n gay girls would say yes

Tony: i am quite literally the last person she’d want to date

Tony: she hasn’t gone out with anyone in forever so that’s another reason,,

Bruce: wow

Bruce: dont u think

Bruce: that maybe

Bruce: just mAybe

Bruce: she’s holding out for you?

_ Peter Parker >> Bruce Banner _

Peter: your boyfriend is an idiot

Bruce: not my boyfriend

Peter: your boyfriend is an idiot

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

jimbo: hi yes hello

jimbo: steve wants me to ask on his behalf

jimbo: “im bored n wanna paint send nudes i mean stuff to draw

jimbo: “

jimbo: (hes in the focus zone or smth n can’t move or itll break)

jimbo: oh shit he’s reaching for his phone

cap: I knew you were going to say something weird and I still let you do it. 

cap: Dammit, Bucky!

jimbo: yeah yeah ok

jimbo: anyway suggestions??

jimbo: steve just disappointed dad sighed and my heart is broken

mohawk man: uhh idk

mohawk man: shrimp 

#2 sherbet stan: Jellyfish

jimbo: carls jr 

cap: What.

cap: The. 

cap: ʰᵉᶜᵏ

cap: …

cap: Have it your way. 

jimbo: wait fr

cap: Yes. Fr. 

jimbo: awwww

jimbo: request: carls jr at sunset, it’s mostly black but there’s some of the light thingy on the edges and there’s a truck too

cap: Alright. 

jimbo: :)

cap: :)

_ Bucky Barnes >> Nat Romanov _

Bucky: :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> on a scale of 1-10, how would you like to see steve in a fedora


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> spiderman: whoa  
jimbo: *sips tea*  
spiderman: *chokes*  
jimbo: me  
jimbo: harder daddy  
#2 sherbet stan: bucky hes 14  
jimbo: oh fuck  
jimbo: dont tell the feds parker

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you  _

mrstank  _ removed  _ Pep 

mrstank: i’ll add her back in a minute but just let me have this ok??

mrstank: ughhhhh

mrstank: life sucks. everything sucks. suck.

mrstank: ok so recent events have made it abundantly clear that pretty much all of you know that im like,,,really into pepper

mrstank: and we’ve gotten pretty close yknow? like idk why but we’ve actually become really good friends 

mrstank: but 

mrstank: theres some stuff i havent told you guys thats been going on lately

mrstank: lately it feels like shes kinda ignoring me?? 

mrstank: like 

mrstank: we’ll be talking at lunch how we usually do

mrstank: and she used to sit next to me and talk to me an whatever

mrstank: and that hasn’t really been happening much lately

mrstank: ik im probably overreacting

mrstank: but she sits at the other end of the table with like nat and clint now

mrstank: and it just kinda sucks cuz i didn’t realize how much better she made my day

mrstank: and she’s not in any of my classes this year and i’ve barely seen her at all

mrstank: i feel like we barely text one on one anymore, if we’re talking it’s usually cuz we just @ each other on the gc

mrstank: and it’s weird cuz i still see her around at like lunch and stuff but...i miss her

mrstank: i miss her a fuck ton

mrstank: that is all

_ Steve Rogers >> Tony Stark _

Steve: I know how that feels. 

Tony: feelsbadman 

Steve: Well, yes.

Steve: That’s been...happening with Bucky and me lately. To a lesser extent, perhaps.

Tony: like i said, feelsbadman

Steve: Yeah.

Steve: Ordinarily, I’d encourage you to ask her out and/or confront her about this, but...I can’t, really. Not without being insanely hypocritical.

Steve: Try to talk to her. Try to remind her why she likes you in the first place (and I’m sure she hasn’t stopped liking you, that would be ridiculous) and initiate conversations and plans. Things like that.

Tony: ...damn, that was actually kind of helpful

Tony: and if not, nice anyway

Tony: i hate that youre such a nice person i cant even be mad

Steve: …

Steve: You know we’re all here for you, Tony. 

Steve: Talk to her. 

Tony: talking to her makes me feel like shit rn

Tony: fine ill try 

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

Rhodey: Damn that sucks dude, wish i could help but idk how

Rhodey: Hope everything turns out aight tho

#2 sherbet stan: Rootin for ya pal!!!

jimbo: yeahhh i kinda feel the same way man, sucks tbh, hopefully everything ends well

spiderman: whoa

jimbo: *sips tea*

spiderman: *chokes*

jimbo: me

jimbo: harder daddy

#2 sherbet stan: bucky hes 14

jimbo: oh fuck

jimbo: dont tell the feds parker

spiderman: wtf

cap: Language!

jimbo: english

cap: You know what I meant

jimbo: ill choke u too if u dont calm down

spiderman: kinky

#2 sherbet stan: Bruhhh you were just the one with his fingers around your neck

#2 sherbet stan: Pot, kettle

Steve: You could never choke me.

jimbo: bet

Steve: Yes

#2 sherbet stan: @spiderman the sexual tension is too much im out

spiderman: yeahh may wants me to help with dinner sooo im just gonna dip

jimbo: im walking to ur house rn

Steve: So this is a serious threat.

jimbo: u best bet it is

Steve: I’m gonna come out on top and you know it.

jimbo: 1) thats what she said and 2) u fuckin wish

Steve: Language

jimbo: wouldnt be surprised u dont know it, only winners can speak my mother tongue

Steve: You’ll teach me your tongue if you don’t choke me?

#2 sherbet stan: gay

jimbo: YOU SAID YOUD LEFT

_ Bucky Barnes >> Nat Romanov _

Bucky: should i do it

Bucky: i might do it

Bucky: i really really really wanna

Bucky: but it’s so scary

Bucky: what if he doesn’t like me that way

Nat: he was just asking abt ur tongue

Bucky: fair

_ Bucky Barnes >> Steve Rogers _

Bucky: so

Bucky: i uh

Steve: You’re literally sitting right next to me. I can see everything you type and we could just have, you know, a normal human conversation

Steve: But yes, go on.

Bucky: nvm lol

Bucky: was gonna say i uhh gotta send u some cursed images but it would ruin the fun if u saw before i sent em

Steve: Okay, Buck.

_ Bucky Barnes >> Nat Romanov _

Bucky: he totally knew i was lying when i backed out of confessing to him and told him some shit about memes

Nat: u useless piece of shit

_ Bucky Barnes >> Steve Rogers _

Bucky: [i_will_eat_your_feet.jpg]   
Bucky: [toes.gif]

Bucky: [pickle_me_elmo.jpg]

Bucky: [why_tf_is_my_ding_dong_hard.jpg]

Steve: Thanks, I really needed that last one

Bucky: wtf steve i can’t tell if that’s sarcasm or not

Bucky: rly hope i didnt just see u save that

Steve: I didn’t save anything what are you talking about

Bucky: ur such a bad liar lmao ur face is so red

Bucky: omg there was zero sarcasm in that first statement

Steve: I didn’t save it

Bucky: whatever you say man

Steve: I DIDN’T SAVE IT.

Bucky: ooooooookkay

_ Bucky Barnes >> Nat Romanov _

Bucky: u probably get tired of me talking abt this but

Bucky: im rly in love w him

Nat: ohhh boy do i know

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

mrstank  _ added  _ Pep

mrstank: i just wanna be the girl in a quirky teen romcom

antman: u and me both buddy

mohawk man: @nat what if we kissed behind the old navy clearance rack 😳😳

nat: im down

#2 sherbet stan: ho dont do it

mrstank: i have No Words yall are fuckin disgusting

mrstank: also, only im allowed to quote vines. traitor

mrstank: u are violating our agreement

#2 sherbet stan: what agreement

mrstank: i will remove u dont test me i stg sam

mrstank: i am not happy rn and i wont hesitate bitch

#2 sherbet stan: :”(

#2 sherbet stan: :((((

mrstank: i cannot be swayed by your puppy dog eyes n sad faces

#2 sherbet stan: :”((

mrstank: FINE oh my godddddd

mrstank: five vines a day.

#2 sherbet stan: ten

mrstank: seven

#2 sherbet stan: aight

mohawk man: [happyhappy.gif]

nat: ur cute, lets fuck

mrstank: jesus christ

mrstank: keep it pg man

nat: just cuz u arent getting any doesnt mean the rest of us arent

mrstank: shut the hell your mouth

Pep: What is going on

Pep: I got a ton of notifications all of a sudden, I thought everyone had finally gotten lives since you weren’t texting

mrstank: yeahhhh uhh internet was down

Pep: Yikes

mrstank: yeah but wer’e all good now

#2 sherbet stan: wer’e

mohawk man: wer’e

nat: wer’e

mrstank: SHUT.

Pep: @mrstank Why are you in AP Lang?

Pep: Lol

mrstank: the shit i put up with on the daily

mrstank: thanks obama

#2 sherbet stan: What’d obama do to you??

mrstank: gave me hope for the world

#2 sherbet stan: truth

spiderman  _ changed  _ Pep’s  _ name to  _ peppa

peppa: What is this

spiderman: peppa 

spiderman: what r u doing in this groupchat??

mrstank: that meme is so dead asshole

mrstank  _ changed  _ spiderman’s  _ name to  _ peter porker

mrstank: hows that for pig jokes

spiderman: at least im not named mr stank

mrstank: wh

mrstank: oh fuck

mrstank  _ changed their name to  _ starcc

starcc: WHO IN THE GODDAMN FUCK CHAGNED MY USERNAME TO MR S T A N K ?

peter porker: it’s been like that for ages sir

peter porker: did u rly not notice?

starcc: …

starcc: i will neither confirm nor deny that i thought it said mrstark

peter porker: LMAOOOOOOO

peter porker: so this is what ppl mean when they say old people have bad eyesight

starcc: I AM EIGHTEEN NOT EIGHTY FOR FUCKS SAKE

peter porker: coulda fooled me lmao

starcc: one more word bugboy, one more word and i will kick you out of this gc

starcc: and that is a promise

peter porker: and i oop—

starcc: THATS IT UR OUT

peter porker: MR STANK

peter porker: I DONT FEEL SO DANK

starcc: U INSOLENT LITTLE SHIT

peter porker: I DONT WANNA GO SIR PLEASE

starcc  _ removed  _ peter porker

peppa: Bring the kid back

starcc: ughhh

peppa: Please

starcc: u know i could never resist u bb

peppa: Please don’t call me “bb”

starcc: duly noted

starcc  _ added  _ peter porker 

peter porker: MR STARK!!! :”D

starcc: listen kiddo i only brought u back cuz pepper wanted me to

starcc: if it wasnt for her ud never talk to me again

peter porker: mr stark, we’re literally lab partners. that wouldn’t work on so many levels

starcc: STOP TRYING TO UNDERMINE MY GENIUS I WILL REMOVE U 

peppa: TONY NO!

starcc: BUT PEPPPP I WANNA

peppa: YOU’RE BETTER THAN THIS TONY!

starcc: NO IM NOT

peppa: YOU ARE! YOU HAVE SO MUCH POTENTIAL FOR GOOD IN YOUR HEART, ALL I WISH IS THAT YOU WOULD RECOGNIZE THAT AND ACT ACCORDINGLY

starcc: wait time out

starcc: what’s that supposed to mean

peppa: Never mind. 

starcc: what

starcc: she’s offline

starcc: did i do something?

peter porker: OHHHHH MY GODDDDDD YOURE LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE MR STARK 

peter porker: SKSKSKSKSKSK I CANT EVEN

starcc: get ur vsco lookin hydroflask ass outta here b4 i do it 4 u

peter porker: eep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> school is going to kill me. that is all.  
i have some other fics i've been working on so if you want to see some clintasha, stony, and stucky in the near future, drop a follow! i'd appreciate it. i promise i'm more articulate when i'm actually writing and not just making up dumb chatroom shit


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Falcon: @mohawk man id fertilize ur crops with my bone meal  
mohawk man: kinky

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

Falcon: Are u a block of dirt

Falcon: Because i dig u

panini: I AM NOT DIRT SAM

Rhodey: Yooooo

Rhodey: You get your phone back?

panini: YES I HAVE ACQUIRED A NEW PHONE

panini: WHY IS MY NAME PANINI

HULK SMASH: uhh idk

peter porker: lil nas x??

panini  _ changed their name to  _ GOD OF THUNDER

panini: THAT IS BETTER

starcc: thor

starcc: buddy

starcc: do u really have to talk in all caps

starcc: its messing with my bisexuality

HULK SMASH: same tbh, i cant read anything uppercase

Falcon: Lmao hypocrite

Falcon: Ur name is literally in caps dude

HULK SMASH: it is? shit

HULK SMASH  _ changed their name to  _ bruce

bruce: forgot i did that

Falcon: suuure, commit to th ebisexual aesthetic after you come out

Falcon: wait a minute

Falcon: nvm that makes sense

Rhodey: Idiot

Falcon: Can i go on with my minecraft pick up lines now?

mohawk man: YES

peter porker: please

Falcon: Damn everyone’s online today

Falcon: *clears throat* big crowd today

Rhodey: Sure you can take it?

Falcon: @Rhodey Are you a witch? Cuz im under your spell

mohawk man: YOU GOT ME BEWITCHED

jimbo: CUZ IM UNDER YOUR SPELL

mohawk man: OHHHHHHH OH OH

jimbo: WOAHHH OHHHHHH OH

jimbo: oh

mohawk man: U MUST BE A WITCH

jimbo: CUZ I AM LIVING IN HELL

starcc  _ removed  _ mohawk man  _ and  _ jimbo

Rhodey: Tony!

Rhodey  _ added  _ mohawk man  _ and  _ jimbo

starcc: botdf is not allowed

starcc: i will not allow this chat to be desecrated by that filth

starcc: this is your one and only warning

mohawk man: @jimbo now is the time

jimbo: @mohawk man now is the hour

mohawk man: @jimbo i am the magic

starcc: SHUT. YOUR FUCK

starcc: SHUTT THE FUCK YOUR MOUTH

Rhodey: English good

Falcon: @Rhodey r u the nether cuz ur hot

Falcon: @starcc are u a torch? Cuz u light up my world

Falcon: @mohawk man id fertilize ur crops with my bone meal

mohawk man: kinky

Falcon: @GOD OF THUNDER I’d need a pickaxe to dig the diamond outta ur eyes

Falcon: @bruce I must be gravel cuz im falling for u

starcc: epic. ur off my blacklist for that

mohawk man: what about me?

starcc: no

_ Steve Rogers >> Bucky Barnes _

Steve: Hey

Steve: Sorry to bother you

Steve: I was wondering   
Steve: Could you come over? I need to talk to you about something.

Steve: It’s important, at least to me, or I wouldn’t have asked.

Steve: You don’t have to say anything. I’ll just do this another time.

Bucky: steve?? Wh

Bucky: something wrong?

Steve: Kind of? Not really. 

Bucky: is ur mom ok??

Steve: Yes

Bucky: u ok?

Steve: That’s...

Bucky: is

Bucky: ok

Bucky: ill be over in five

Steve: You don’t have to.

Bucky: u asked, what kinda guy would i be if i just ignored that

Steve: I know it’s been weird lately.

Steve: And I’m sorry about that.

Steve: It’s my fault — just, I had a lot of revelations at once and it was overwhelming.

Steve: I shouldn’t have dragged you into it, and I’m sorry about that.

Steve: I don’t like not talking to you.

Bucky: im here

Steve: Okay.

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

GOD OF THUNDER: GUESS WHAT

starcc: chicken butt

starcc: ha

GOD OF THUNDER: I AM STAYING IN AMERICA FOR ANOTHER YEAR!

GOD OF THUNDER: MY FATHER STILL HAS MUCH TO SORT OUT, SO INSTEAD OF LEAVING THIS WINTER I WILL BE STAYING UNTIL NEXT FALL!

GOD OF THUNDER: @starcc @bruce @peppa I WILL ATTEND YOUR GRADUATION, FRIENDS!

starcc: sweet, teach me ur sick hammer skillz

nat: thats the best news ive heard all week. good on u, bud

peppa: That’s great!

_ Pepper Potts >> Nat Romanov _

Pepper: Hey

Pepper: I’ve actually been meaning to talk to you for a while

Nat: is this about tony by any chance

Pepper: ...yes, actually. How did you — 

Nat: so?? whats goin on

Pepper: Well

Pepper: I, uh…

Pepper: I like Tony. 

Pepper: I don’t know how, or why, or when, although it was pretty recently, but it’s happening now. 

Pepper: And you’re a girl in a successful relationship so I figured I might talk to you about it

Nat: why. why does this keep happening to me

Pepper: What

Nat: nvm 

Pepper: What do I do? I was wondering if you’d have any insight into whether

Pepper: Uh...what’s going on with him. I don’t even know if he’s single, honestly. Or likes girls

Nat: yeaaaah

Nat: hes single

Nat: n likes gril s

Nat: yall should date n thats all i’m gonna say

Pepper: Nat, wait —

Nat: gn 

Pepper: Shit

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

Bruce: walkin down the street 

Bruce: n i see a pretty fella

Bruce: i say hey can you be the troy to my gabriella

peppa: Didn’t they break up though

Bruce: lmao idk i just needed smth to rhyme

peppa: Wait no, I’m pretty sure they got back together

peppa: wait no

starcc: pep

peppa: speaking 

starcc: are you FUCKING KIDDING ME

starcc: ur sayin u don’t remember high school musical’s top tier plot

starcc: this is an actual outrage i will have to correct asap

starcc: dad’s out saturday

starcc: u should come over n watch hsm with me

peppa: Sure

Bruce: @spiderman get ur ass in the chat buddy

Bruce: @spiderman or dm me, we have tea to spill 

spiderman: you called? i got tea

starcc: why r u here, u don’t have permission from me

spiderman: classic boomer move

starcc: fucking zoomer

Bruce: excuse me wHAT

starcc: u heard me

_ Tony Stark >> Pepper Potts _

Tony: so ur actually coming over right?? i wasnt joking

Pepper: Neither was I. See you in two days

Tony: good. hsm is a classic n i cannot have u not knowing the difference between 2 & 3

Pepper: Well, if it’s that important to you

Pepper: I guess I’ll watch with you

Pepper: You’re the boss

Pepper: Sir

Tony: god thats hot

Pepper: Kinky?? 

Tony: NOT****

Tony: I was gonna say not true

Tony: must’ve hit the key wrong 

Pepper: Suuure

Tony: IM SERIOUSING YOU

Pepper: See you tomorrow lol

_ Pepper Potts >> Nat Romanov _

Pepper: NAT

Pepper: You know how Tony changed my name to pep loml a while ago

Nat: yeah eht

Nat: why

Pepper: Curiosity got the better of me and I looked it up on urbandictionary

Nat: o h

Pepper: Loml means love of my life

Pepper: What even— 

Nat: liek i said

Nat: can’t say anything but u should ask him out before he does smth

Pepper: Holy shit.

Pepper: I don’t know if I should be more excited or terrified.

Nat: ill let u decide on that one chief. im logginf off now so go talk to ur bf

Pepper: I’ll try

Pepper: Thanks Nat

Nat: dont mention it. although i do expect u to hel pme with my al2trig hw

Pepper:

Pepper: Fair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> school sucks major ass


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky: i love u  
Bucky: like romanticcallally  
Bucky: aaaand that isnt how u spell it, is it?? damn

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

nat: clints high again

cap: Clint!

cap: We talked about this!

nat: hit his juul harder than he hit ur mom last night

cap: Ha.

nat: not funny?

cap: No.

peter porker: [therewasanattempt.jpg]

peter porker: PLEASE DONT DO COCAINE

Bruce: ay

peter porker: COCAINE RUIN YOUR BRAIN

Bruce: aY

peter porker: PLEASE DONT DO COCAINE

Bruce: AY

peter porker: COCAINE RUIN YOUR BRAIN

cap: What is going on

Bruce: AYY

nat: gen z appears to have risen, captain

cap: I thought we were millennials?

nat: ur a boomer steve

cap: My grandmother was a boomer? How?

nat: just listen to urself 

nat: u talk n text liek an old man

peter porker: BLEASE DONT DO COCAINE

starcc: shut

nat: i see u have returned

nat: how was Movie

starcc: good actually thx

peter porker: omg omg omg

peter porker: forgot u and pepper watched hsm

peter porker: was it enjoyable

starcc: it was nice :)

nat: im calling it now, yall are boning

_ Pepper Potts >> Nat Romanov _

Nat: how was it 

Pepper: Magical

Nat: ok tea

Pepper: Ahhhhh

Pepper: He may or may not have kissed me when Zac Efron kissed Gabriella 

Pepper: He had this really soft look in his eyes and then he just…leaned in

Nat: yall r fucjin disgusting romantics, i love it

Nat: congrats dude

Pepper: Thanks!! Ahh

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

peter porker: guy s

peter porker: im saddd

bruce: u good?

peter porker: nO

peter porker: i miss the office :”(

bruce: oh

bruce: damn now im sad too

peter porker: sorryyy

nat: whyre u sad

nat: ah

GOD OF THUNDER: NOT TO WORRY, FRIENDS! MIGHT I SUGGEST A GROUP VIEWING SESSION OF THIS “OFFICE?”

Falcon: Thor

Falcon: Do u seriously not know what the office is

GOD OF THUNDER: I AM NOT ENTIRELY SURE WHAT IS HAPPENING, BUT I WILL TRY MY BEST TO CHEER MY FRIENDS UP! I DISLIKE SEEING THEM UNHAPPY

bruce: aww

peter porker: thats sweet ty thor

mohawk man: guys my right eye is all itchy

mohawk man: its super swollen too 

mohawk man: [im_not_crying.jpg]

peter porker: gross

mohawk man: ik it LOOKS Like im cryign but. im nott

Falcon: Bruh

Falcon: Nobody needed to see that so early in the morning

nat: sam, it’s one pm

Falcon: exactly

peter porker: guys can we actually do this office watch party thing

peter porker: i miss pam :(

Falcon: Ur favorite is pam???

peter porker: yeha why??/

Falcon: fuckin lame lmao,, i stan angela and angela only

peter porker: hey dont be mean to pamela!! she doesnt deserve it, she just wanted to do art :(

nat: dwight is the only real answer

mohawk man: agreed

bruce: if i may

nat: no u may not

bruce: if you hate michael i will fight you

bruce: that is all

Falcon: ok fine, michael is god

nat: yes

peter porker: i hate gabe

mohawk man: gabriel susan lewis

GOD OF THUNDER: I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS TALK BUT I AM ENJOYING SEEING EVERYONE CONNECT OVER SHARED INTERESTS! I WOULD NOT BE OPPOSED TO HOSTING THIS WATCH FESTIVAL!

nat: watch party**

GOD OF THUNDER: YES!

bruce: im down

peter porker: i have been down since the idea was suggested

nat: ig we gotta wait for everyone else, idk why they arent online rn

_ Bucky Barnes >> Steve Rogers _

Bucky: howdy

Steve: Howdy

Bucky: u see what theyre sayin on the gc

Steve: An Office watch party? Isn’t that the show you’ve been trying to get me to watch?

Bucky: yep

Steve: Can’t we finish Sherlock first?

Steve: I hate watching more than three things at once

Bucky: how do u even survive

Bucky: but yeah ok

Bucky: come over

Steve: On my way :)

Bucky: :)

Bucky: (yesss)

Steve: ?

Bucky: nothin

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

jimbo: stevie n i are down for the office

jimbo: can we start from ep1 tho

jimbo: cuz he hasnt watched any yet

GOD OF THUNDER: ANOTHER CONFIRMATION! WE SHALL START FROM THE FIRST EPISODE, AS I HAVE NOT WATCHED THIS YET EITHER

jimbo: sweet

starcc: i can come

jimbo: thats what she said

starcc: cant believe steve puts up with u when u say stupid shit like this

jimbo: (:

starcc:

starcc: something about that backwards smiley face is deeply unsettling

jimbo: (: (: (:

starcc: sTOPP

GOD OF THUNDER: I CANNOT WAIT! SHALL WE PLAN FOR THIS FRIDAY? I WILL PREPARE REFRESHMENTS!

jimbo: sure thing bud

jimbo : (:

starcc: i hate u so much

jimbo: love u too (:

starcc: lmao gay

jimbo: yes i am

starcc: imagine not being in a relationship rn lmao

starcc: sucks to suck huh

jimbo: wooooow

jimbo: foul play. itll happen eventually, if its meant to

starcc: nothings ever gonna happen if you never do anything

jimbo: huh

jimbo:

jimbo: iguess ur right

_ Steve Rogers >> Bucky Barnes  _

Steve: Here

Bucky: cool cool

Bucky: come in, doors unlocked

Steve: I brought microwave popcorn

Bucky: omgomgomg

Steve: ?

Bucky: thankkkyou i love u so much

Steve: Love you too :)

Bucky: :)

_ Bucky Barnes >> Tony Stark _

Bucky: why is it

Bucky: that whenever steve does smth cute n unintentionally gay

Bucky: i can hear ur voice in my head calling us married

Tony: damn, even mind-me be spittin straight facts

Bucky: why are we even friends

Tony: do u want me to list ever ything ive ever done for u

Bucky: i want u to shut up so steve and i can watch the last two episodes of sherlock in peace

Tony: gay

Bucky: ur mom

Bucky: gnight tony

Tony: …its 3pm

Tony: oh well

Tony: john n sherlock r gay

Tony: did u put me on do not disturb

Tony: *gasp*

Tony: u dID

Tony: evil

Tony: ok fine

Tony: have fun with ur boyfriend lmao

— 

_ Steve Rogers >> Bucky Barnes _

Steve: I’m sorry if this is awkward for you in any way, shape, or form, because it’s sure as hell awkward for me.

Bucky: wh

Steve: When I was over yesterday, I saw some messages on your phone from Tony. Unless I’m reading the context wrong, he referred to me as “your boyfriend.” He was probably kidding, or maybe it’s some sort of inside joke you two have, but I couldn’t stop thinking about it all night so I figured I might as well set the record straight. 

Steve: I’m in love with you.

Steve: I don’t know how else to say it, so there it is. I’ve been for...wow, it feels like forever. Grade school, even though I couldn’t find the words for it then. For you.

Steve: And I love you, too. I love you, and I’m in love with you. And I’ll love you no matter what you say. If you want to reject me, don’t feel as though you aren’t allowed to or anything, because 

Bucky: steve

Steve: Yes?

Bucky: blease fuck the shut up of cOURSE i love u

Bucky: dumbass

Steve: Thank goodness, I almost had a heart attack. Moronic. 

Bucky: i thought i was the moron >:(

Steve: Nah, you’re the jerk.

Bucky: punk

Steve: Idiot

Bucky: i love u

Bucky: like romanticcallally 

Bucky: aaaand that isnt how u spell it, is it?? damn

Steve: LMAO you ruined a moment there.

Bucky: first off that isnt how u use textspeak ever

Bucky: second off, shut. im tryign my best here

Steve: Ro-man-ti-cal-ly

Steve: Romantically

Bucky: yeah, what u said

Bucky: i like u that

Steve: Me too.

Steve: :)

Bucky: god fucking dammit i LOVE ur little smileys they make me rly happy ughhfskdjf

Steve: Me too. I started using them to...you know...mirror what you were doing, or whatever. Did it work?

Bucky: stevie, u blew my heart away into tiny pieces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys guys guys i'm super sorry!! i've had absolutely no time to write anything within the past two weeks until literally just now, school is back in session and it's kicking my ass :")
> 
> but anyway!! weekly updates will continue on sundays, although we've almost reached the end of the story (i think there'll be a couple more chapters??). the only reason why i posted today (wednesday) was because i hadn't for two weeks and i wanted this chapter up as soon as possible for you guys.  
lastly, don't forget to stay hydrated! i hope you're having a good day :D


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> GOD OF THUNDER: WHAT IS PIANO ROCK?  
starcc: a question i ask myself every day

_ Steve Rogers >> Bucky Barnes _

Steve: Bucky!

Steve: I have a really funny prank idea!!

Bucky: dude ur literally sitting right next to me why u gotta type

Steve: Evidence

Bucky: ok shoot

Steve: So you know how we haven’t told anyone we’re together?

Bucky: yeahh?

Steve: And that Office night thing is happening tomorrow night

Steve: You know what’d be really funny?

Bucky: ur supposed to be telling me

Steve: We should act all coupley but tell them we aren’t together

Steve: So they just think we’re really oblivious

Bucky: HAHAHASHHSHDHFHFJGJG LMAO Y E S

Bucky: IDEA

Bucky: at one point we kiss n everyone looks at us n we’re just like whhh what it’s just a friend thing we do this all the time

Steve: Yes!

Steve: And afterward we can tell them we’re dating I guess

Steve: Lmao

Bucky: omg

Bucky: u did it

Bucky: ilysm 

Steve: Did what?

Bucky: ur lmao isn’t in caps

Steve: Yeah, Sam and I had a discussion on how to text so as to not sound so...forced, for lack of a better word

Bucky: wow

Steve: I’m keeping caps on, though. 

Steve: And I really do want to keep my proper punctuation. 

Bucky: fair. ik how much u love ur punctuation 

Steve: Yeah.

Steve: By the way...what does ilysm mean?

Bucky:

Bucky: some things never change 

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you  _

antman: guys

antman: i can’t make it today :((

antman: rly wanted to watch the office with u guys

antman: but we gotta go visit my grandparents over the weekend

antman: sadface

Falcon: All good bromeo

Falcon: Nat and i will update u on the piping hot t e a

antman: sweet!! thx man ur the best 

Falcon: no u

antman: uno reverse. game cycles back to me and i lay down a draw 4. u pick up & play the only card u can — red 6. useless. i slam down my bLOOD ORANGE LOVE & SUPPORT CARD, U LOSE I WIN & U GET ALL MY AFFECTION

jimbo: lmao gay 

Falcon: Just a little

antman: sam sam sam if we don’t call our baby girl Cassie we gotta get divorced 

jimbo: what in the fuck is going?? on

Falcon: Ju st roll with it dude

_ Clint Barton >> Nat Romanov _

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you  _

jimbo: guys

jimbo: ap teachers suck

jimbo: well coulsons ok ig but the rest suck ass

Rhodey: What happened

jimbo: Zemo gave me a fucking d plus

jimbo: first of all, fuck him

jimbo: he said my sources didn’t match up with my claim but they totally did,,,

jimbo: he was just being a homophobic asshole

Rhodey: God that really sucks i’m sorry man

Rhodey: All of those teachers, you know that group

jimbo: yeah, schmidt and zemo and fuckin zola even 

Rhodey: Yeah those guys, they suck

starcc: we talkin bout zemo?

jimbo: yeah :(

starcc: dw, u can still bring ur grade back up, we’re only halfway through second quarter

starcc: but yeah they suck,,, p sure they circlejerk to the idea of a fat f on a paper

jimbo: yeah...ik it isn’t the end but it sucksss

Rhodey: Idea, if i may: you get steve to tutor you

starcc: ah

starcc: oH

starcc: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

starcc: yeaaaaaaaaaaaaH u should do thatt 

jimbo: oh my gOd

_ Bucky Barnes >> Steve Rogers _

Bucky: dude 

Bucky: they totally don’t think. we’re dating

Bucky: all set for tonight b

Steve: All right!

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you  _

peter porker: ive been waitin gfor this moment all my life

starcc: office time baybee

nat: i am here strictly to watch yall make fools of urselves

nat: that is all

GOD OF THUNDER: WHAT IS PIANO ROCK?

starcc: a question i ask myself every day

starcc: omg

Rhodey: Yall

starcc: @Rhodey u seein dis shit??

Rhodey: @starcc u bet  👀👀

mohawk man: stop blowing up my phone

GOD OF THUNDER: INTRIGUING!   
jimbo: he means “fuck off”

mohawk man: what shit r we supposed to be seein

nat: idiocy

mohawk man: just telllllllll meeeeeeee nattttttttttt

_ Bucky Barnes >> Nat Romanov _

Nat: bucky

Nat: a suggestion, if i may

Nat: plEase stop using axe

Nat: use that cinnamon one again

Bucky: may i ask how u —

Bucky: nvm i don’t wanna know

Bucky: does this have to do w steve

Nat: idk does it?

Bucky: it does doesn’t it

Bucky: fine

Bucky: i’ll go back to old spice 

Nat: thank gOD

Nat: fuckin hate axe

Bucky: wait is this not about steve

Nat: it is definitely about steve but also i can smell that shit from across the room

_ that wasn’t very cash money of you _

peppa: @Rhodey I think we’re seeing the same thing

Rhodey: Chief chief chief

peppa: Steve and Bucky???

Rhodey: Steve n bucky

Rhodey: u right

starcc: are they like,,,together?? or is this like. the ultimate friendzone

nat: theyre either already dating or both hopelessly oblivious

Falcon: bruh momento numero dos

starcc: wh

Falcon: @GOD OF THUNDER theyre literally spooning on ur fuckin couch bro

GOD OF THUNDER: WHAT IS ‘SPOONING’?

Falcon: @cap im callin it, yall r fucking

cap: Guys, can we just watch The Office in peace? I keep getting all of these notifications, I can’t focus

Falcon: STEV E

Falcon: STTEVFE

Falcon: AR EYAL L DATINNFG OR

jimbo: yall shut the fuck UP

peppa: Aww. Jim and Pam! It’s like an origin story UwU

nat: pep we cant b friends anymore

nat: the uwu was the end of the line

jimbo: end..ofthe...li ne

jimbo: @cap with u...till the end of the line

cap: Don’t quote cartoons at me, Bucky

jimbo: not a cartoon but ok

jimbo: boomer

peter porker: OHHHHHHHHHHH

Falcon: OHHHHHHHHHHHH

mohawk man: OHHHHHHHHHHHH

nat: goddamn

Rhodey: Not funny didnt laugh

Rhodey: Fr tho, ok boomer goes hard

mohawk man: facts

GOD OF THUNDER: I SEE!

GOD OF THUNDER: @cap @jimbo I WISH YOU LUCK IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP! 

jimbo: we...arent dating???

cap: We’re...just friends?

nat: say sike right now

mohawk man: calling bullshit

jimbo: no bs to call

Rhodey: steve ur literally laughing into bucky’s hair

Falcon: BRO THEY JUST FUCKIN KISSED

Falcon: YALL ON SOME B U L L . S H I T .

cap: I’m sorry, Buck! I couldn’t stop laughing

cap: I really tried…

jimbo: a+ for effort 

jimbo: love u tho

cap: Love you too, Bucky <3

mohawk man: AYYYYYYYY

Falcon: not to say i called it but i. called it

cap: Debatable.

jimbo: ^^ nat called it first 

Falcon: 

Falcon: MOTHERF— 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is shit but i wrote this in between studying for finals. i know i promised an update like a month and a half ago and never did and i have...nothing to say for myself

**Author's Note:**

> i did this instead of sleeping, you're welcome


End file.
